A client recently asked me, “so, what’s on the radar?” I knew what she meant, but in that moment I had a clear, strong vision of a busy air traffic control tower. All the screens were full of moving blips, all the controllers were intently focused on the patterns there, firing off information into their headset microphones – for the next day’s flights.
I shared with her what I had seen and we both chuckled a bit. Then, she grew somewhat serious and said, “But you’re a Tarot reader – you’re supposed to tell me what’s coming up in the future, right?” Yes, true enough. Do it all the time. But the time we have and the time we’re in is now and that’s the jump-off point for any reading. Quantum physics tells us it’s all now and while I believe that’s true, it’s still pretty challenging to communicate from the concept of completely transcended linear time. Ok, I just confused myself – in other words, it’s a helluva lot easier to speak and think in terms of the past, present and future.
When we attempt to focus on and see only the future, in a reading or in any aspect of life, several things happen.
We ignore or miss the here and now
When we’re in pain, anxious or uncertain, this can actually seem like a good thing to do. But, now is what we have – and whether there’s a lesson to be learned, action to be taken, or valuable information coming in – if we miss it, we miss a golden opportunity to make positive changes in both the present and the future. Much as we might love to just skip the “now” if it’s unpleasant; we can’t really live in or “be” in the past or the future – only the present.
We ignore our own intuition
Tarot reading, or any form of divination, is designed to help us learn from and integrate our past in order to understand, and positively affect our future based on who we are and where we are in the present. But as wonderful as that is, it can’t ever be better than our present-moment experiences and the opportunity they present for our own intuition to give us real-time, real-life guidance, wisdom and truth. Tarot is a great enhancement to our own intuition but a very poor substitute for it.
When the temptation is strong to try and look only at the future in a reading, think about being on one of today’s flights while those busy air traffic controllers all have their radar set on tomorrow…
…and thank you for flying Destiny Airlines!
Love and peace,
Dona
Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®
Sunday, March 30, 2008
What’s on Your Radar?
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Failing Forward
No, that’s not a typo. Failing forward is a way to turn mistakes into opportunities for success. Ah, mistakes. We all make them. We wish we could completely avoid them, which would of course make us perfect. Or, having experienced failure, we give up because we equate failing at something with being a failure. We can judge ourselves so harshly that we swear we’ll never again risk, never try, never dare.
What if we could change our perception of and response to failure? Many famous and distinguished people in the arts, sciences, business and sports have failed – sometimes spectacularly so, on their path to achievement.
John Maxwell is an American expert on leadership and author of “Failing Forward” who says that the major difference between achieving people and average people is their ability to move beyond failure and use it as a lesson and a stepping-stone. With the right attitude, positive benefits can come from negative experiences. When we realize that the task or goal is not “us”, we can look at failure as a way to learn what went wrong and what not to repeat. By depersonalizing the experience (we are not “failures” just because we failed at something) we minimize and overcome fear. And, without fear – we can take action again!
Here are some great ideas for learning to fail forward from author Marilyn J. Tellez, MA:
1. Failing forward is really about achievement as a series of trial and error opportunities.
2. You, as a person, are not a failure. Failure is a state of mind.
3. You are not a victim. Take responsibility for what you can control and put yourself into a position of power. (And what you can control is yourself – DCM)
4. You can control how you let a trauma affect you. (I would say, you can “choose how you let a trauma affect you” – DCM)
5. The present is the only place real opportunity exists and where you can take action.
6. Letting go of limiting beliefs may be hard on the ego, but your ability to move forward will increase dramatically.
7. When you have a vision, you have a view that puts failure in its proper perspective.
8. There is always uncertainty when you try something new.
9. You can't make significant progress by doing it all yourself. Let your environment and network do some of the work.
10. Often, the only difference between success and failure is simple persistence.
11. Knowing when to let go and try something else is important. Failing forward is about getting up and moving on. (And what you do once you get up – which is not repeat the same mistakes! - DCM)
So here’s to failing and falling, learning and growing, going forward and succeeding in the New Year!
Love and peace,
Dona
Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®
Monday, November 19, 2007
The Ultimate in Customer Service
Is God the Hairy Thunderer? The Cosmic Muffin? Or is God the Ultimate Customer Service Rep?
God (Source, Spirit, the Universe, the Higher Power) answers every prayer, and the answer is never “no”. I can hear many of you saying to yourselves, “That’s not true! No way! B******t!!” When I read this little pearl of wisdom from an e-mail I received; which doubtless has made the rounds of cyberspace many times, that’s what I said to myself.
Then I thought about it a bit. First I thought about all the happiness, success and joy that have come into my life. All those “yes!” answers – God was really listening and paying attention those times, for sure!
When I thought of all my disappointments, unmet expectations, dreams that hadn’t materialized and perceived failures – my own as well as those of others – I said, but those must be the painful, heartbreaking “nos”, or the prayers God must not have heard or bothered about. The more I compared what I thought was an unanswered prayer, or a prayer answered by a cruel, harsh, resounding “no” with these responses, I realized that anything I had prayed for or about had been answered – with the best possible answer.
So, now I’m onboard with this little tidbit of e-mail wisdom, and a believer.
I believe that God only gives three answers to prayer:
1. "Yes!"
2. "Not yet."
3. "I have something better in mind."
Give it a try with your own prayers – the ones that you celebrated as a Yes, but especially the ones that you felt had fallen on deaf ears or been denied.
Love and peace,
Dona
“Hairy Thunderer” and “Cosmic Muffin” from Deteriorata, National Lampoon, 1972
Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®
Monday, October 1, 2007
My First Radio Show!
I’ve been invited to the Tom & Lisa Morning show on 95.1 FM (95 Will Rock!), a northeastern Wisconsin/northeastern Illinois radio station. My live, guest broadcast with listener call-ins is on Wednesday, October 3rd beginning at 7:30 a.m CDT. Their morning show is fun and lively, featuring talk as well as hard rock. I’m a bit old for Ozzie and Metallica, but hey – I get to talk about what I do, how I do it, and take live calls to answer general questions about Tarot as well as give free readings to their listening audience.
I am really looking forward to Wednesday morning and hope you can join in to listen live via the radio or through their web simulcast at: :95 Will Rock!
Love and peace,
Dona
Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®
Monday, August 13, 2007
Buddha and the Blue Streak*
Lately, I’ve had several clients consulting me about their career opportunities. Whether looking for work while unemployed, or seeking to better their career prospects through new jobs, the questions focus on both the exhilaration and frustration of the search process.
In many ways it’s like the dating process – the mutual evaluation between the seeker and the prospective employer, waiting for phone calls, looking for ways to best meet our needs and do something that brings us a rewarding experience as well as offering our best to the other party.
Another similarity to the dating process is the feeling of vulnerability that comes from “putting ourselves out there” and risking rejection. However, without risking potential rejection we also eliminate the chance for acceptance.
When a client of mine recently expressed through a series of e-mails the wild upswings and downturns she was experiencing during her job search, she stated her frustration with the process and her feelings of exhaustion. Her feelings were constantly fluctuating based on the moment-to-moment changes in her situation: a good prospect turned out to be a poor match, an offer from a very desirable company didn’t come, an offer came that wasn’t very desirable or suitable…all of us have been through these experiences, and it often feels exactly like a ride on a wild roller coaster.
I addressed her concerns with this, a Buddhist perspective:
"Suffer what there is to suffer. Enjoy what there is to enjoy. Regard both suffering and joy as facts of life, and continue… no matter what happens.”
From the Gosho of Nichiren Daishonin
It is counter-productive and detrimental to our health and well-being to repress, deny or try NOT to feel what we feel; whether it’s elation and excitement or disappointment and sadness. The key is non-attachment: to feel what we feel yet not attach a sense of permanence or meaning to the feeling beyond the present moment.
That overused cliché of the day, "it is what it is" actually expresses the core of this philosophy. It's when we take our feelings (which are transient) and attach to them as a fixed state (“things will always be this way…) or extrapolate from them future states (“this is how it’s always going to be…it will never change…”) that we get ourselves into trouble.
We step on and strap into the roller-coaster ride when we allow external circumstances to hit us where we live (our internal center of self-confidence, self-esteem and our sense of self-worth). The mercurial changes in our mood and feelings, excited and happy one moment, disappointed and anxious the next moment, are a result of attachment. External circumstances change all the time - often radically, and they turn on a dime. The more attached we are, the rougher the ride - up, down, up, down, over and over, all the time.
So in work, in love, or in any situation where you find your feelings and moods alternately soaring and plummeting; stop and take a breath. Step back. Observe and recognize the transient nature of each moment. You will regain your center, feel calm and comfortable in your own skin – and be happy.
Love and peace,
Dona
*Blue Streak is a roller coaster ride at the Cedar Point amusement park in Sandusky, Ohio.
Experience a Tarot reading with me! Visit:Destiny Tarot®
