Monthly Tarotcast February 15 - March 15, 2010

Every month, I’ll be taking a look at the current mid-month to the following mid-month’s energies. In much the same way as lunar cycles and planetary movements and transitions affect all of us astrologically, the Tarot can prepare us for the energies we’re all likely to be dealing with.

Overview

Five of Wands: the general energy of this period is competitive. This is primarily around our work and careers, where we may find ourselves striving for recognition and acknowledgement for our contributions against stiff but healthy competition. However, this can also manifest in not so healthy ways in the form of backstabbing, undermining or destructive gossip. Our best course of action is to stay focused on the task at hand and do our very best. This card can also indicate how well we exhibit grace under pressure and how adept we are at handling conflict in an impersonal and constructive way.

Week 1

Nine of Cups: moving into the first week of this period, we see the one bright – overridingly bright – spot in an otherwise mostly challenging month. In some way – a wish we have for our lives will be fulfilled this week. It comes as both a divine gift as well as a reminder that no matter how rough things may become, problems are temporary and we will ultimately win the day (month). This can also be a great week for positive developments in our romantic relationships; either by deepening an existing connection or discovering a new one.

Week 2

The Tower: The second week of this period and a violent upheaval is in the works. Though this card is often viewed as negative, it can be exactly what’s needed when old, outmoded or outgrown structures must be torn down. The more gracefully we can accept our lives being swept clean – no matter how surprising the events we experience – the better. And, the sooner we will rebuild. Expect the unexpected and look for the silver lining promised in week one by the Nine of Cups.

Week 3

Seven of Swords: The third week of this period highlights self-protective energy. We needn’t allow others to take advantage of us, and we’re being put on notice to actively guard against that. Foster healthy skepticism in uncertain circumstances, but don’t fall prey to paranoia. You may need to negotiate carefully and keep your own cards close to your vest, but avoid outright mistrust and unnecessary secrecy. Either of these will only serve to further complicate matters.

Week 4

Three of Swords:

In the final week of this period we may find ourselves experiencing loss and heartbreak despite our best efforts. Again, a reminder that the energy of Week One (Nine of Cups) will carry us through the worst of the situation if we’re able to accept some temporary distress. Intense emotions require clear-sightedness. Denial, repression and escapism will only worsen the discomfort. We need to be prepared to let go of whatever we must for the wish of the first week’s energy to come to manifestation and fruition.

An individualized Tarot reading with me can tell you more specifically how you’ll be affected, so call today for a personalized, in-depth look into your life’s possibilities.


Copyright 2010© Dona C. Murphy, Destiny Tarot®

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Setting Healthy Boundaries: Dealmakers or Dealbreakers?

Yesterday – the Dealmakers list, your own personal standards that express healthy, positive boundaries; that make your non-romantic relationships a source of happiness for you and enrich your life. Today – “don’ts” or the Dealbreakers list, the things that raise a red flag and make you seriously reconsider or step back from someone as a potential romantic partner. These boundaries are your own “line in the sand,” and knowing them before you become involved with someone can save you wasted time, tears, and heartache. Notice I didn’t say, “Before you become attracted”? Attraction can happen in an instant, without knowing a single thing about a person. Involvement however, is a choice.

I like to call the Dealbreakers “Get thee behind me, Mr. Unavailable”. Once you are clear for yourself on these, in combination with your Dealmakers, you’ll know your own standards and know whether the qualities and behaviors of a man you’re interested in are what you really want – before you become emotionally invested and involved.

The Dealbreakers list

First, think about the things that go into making a healthy romantic relationship and give it a good chance of developing and working for both people involved. Then think about the things you aren’t comfortable with, aren’t prepared to accept, that you dislike or that bother you when they are part of a relationship. This list is for you alone, so be honest and write them down in a short list. Be specific - i.e., no abuse (of any kind), the man isn’t married/attached, is not a player, etc., but don’t nitpick or try to nail down every possible trait/quality.

These are your standards – and your dating action plan. If the man doesn’t meet the basic standards at the get-go, or if you find he has stepped over the line or tested the boundaries you’ve identified as unacceptable to you, you need to take action. Real action is not a long discussion or an explanation/justification of yourself or your feelings. Run away, walk away or at the very least take one huge giant step backwards and stop. Your boundaries only mean as much to others as they do to you. If you won’t honor your own, it’s very unlikely that they will.

The behaviors you accept, rationalize, accommodate or excuse from the man in your life (or the one you’re hoping to have a relationship with), can quickly become the relationship standard or status quo and it’s much harder to reject a behavior once you’ve quietly accepted it. By rejecting the behavior, you give a man a choice – to respect you or to let you alone. And if he can’t respect you, what else can’t he do? Be emotionally, physically and spiritually available to you? Be kind, considerate, honest and trustworthy?

Natalie Lue, author of “Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback Girl” states that emotionally unavailable men are adept at manipulating women and relationships to their advantage. She says, “The ability to get you to adapt to their dysfunctional behaviour is a masterstroke on their part.” But consider this. Could you be manipulated by a friend into stealing something or harming someone? Could they convince you to go against your own better judgment, ethics, your standards? And if they could, or would try – are they really your friend?

Healthy boundaries and personal standards work! They affirm that we respect ourselves, love ourselves and want those things in return from our relationships.


Love and peace,
Dona


“Mr. Unavailable”, “Fallback Girl” copyright Natalie Lue.


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Destiny Tarot® Copyright 2008 by Dona C. Murphy. All rights reserved.