Does The Golden Rule Measure Up?

We all learned it, probably as small children. We've all heard it a million times. Simple yet profound, the concept is easy to grasp but can be incredibly challenging to live. “Treat others as you would like to be treated.”

This basic moral principle is found in nearly all religions and cultures. Also called the ethic of reciprocity, the context in which we find ourselves applying it can make a world of difference in its effectiveness and validity.

The ability to put oneself in another’s shoes is one way that the golden rule works. It allows us to go beyond our personal preferences or idiosyncrasies and add another dimension to the principle, “Treat others as you would like to be treated, if you were them.” Otherwise in applying the rule I might feel it my duty to buy everyone I know chocolate ice cream, even if they dislike chocolate or are allergic to it.

The really tough issues arise when the “other” doesn’t honor the Golden rule, or lives by a different rule altogether. Let’s say you’ve treated someone with kindness, respect and compassion, yet they’ve treated you with cruelty, carelessness and a lack of consideration.

Now what?

This is where several ethical systems come into conflict and competition with the Golden Rule and with each other.

The Silver Rule: Do not do to others what you would not have them do to you
This rule avoids responding in kind, seeking revenge or retribution – getting an eye for an eye, or getting two eyes for an eye. So it doesn’t repay cruelty or violence with cruelty or violence, but it doesn’t sit back and get steamrolled either. Non-violent assertion, standing up for one’s rights and what one believes in without sinking to the other’s level can be a powerful means for change. It might even get the other to realize the error of their ways and correct them. But it’s hard to imagine a sociopath being shamed or embarrassed into changing his or her ways.

The Brass Rule: Do to others what they do to you
This is the classic response in kind. Repay kindness with kindness and evil with justice at best, revenge or retribution at worst. This is familiar to most of us and for better or worse, where most of us operate. The problem with the Brass Rule despite its apparent logic is that it can and often does create an unending cycle of evil and violence, especially since kindness and peace are hard to live, and evil and violence are easy.

The Iron Rule: Do to others as you like, before they do it to you
This is the classic show of contempt for the Golden Rule. Many people operate from this position, openly or secretly. They will do whatever they feel they can get away with, whatever they feel will give them power or an edge over others, and other people’s actions; good, bad or neutral have no bearing on the situation.

We get to choose
A personal code of ethics that works is a hard thing to come by, especially in the face of so many competing and contradictory belief systems. The Golden and Silver Rules don’t adequately address injustice, evil or just plain bad behavior. The Brass and Iron Rules are at best, subsistence level survival, dog-eat-dog laws of the jungle at worst.

In an essay on the Golden Rule, Harry J. Gensler writes: “The golden rule is best seen as a consistency principle…It only prescribes consistency that our actions (toward another) not be out of harmony with our desires (toward a reversed-situation action). It tests our moral coherence. If we violate the golden rule, then we’re violating the spirit of fairness and concern for people that lies at the heart of morality.”

When we align ourselves with a principle which seeks to serve the highest good of all, we are moral beings, even if we fall short or strive and occasionally fail.


Love and peace,
Dona


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